Do not sit right next to somebody if the cinema is half empty.
Do not reserve 27 seats if your friends are late… “No, this seat isn’t taken, my arse is in it now.”
Do not be late.
Do not be an arsehole to cinema staff.
Do not bring a screaming little mofo to a movie that isn’t in their demographic.
Do not kick the seat in front of you.
Do not fidget or continually shift in your seat… if you’re bored, fuck off.
Do not talk to the person next to you during the movie… STFU.
Do not say, “Oh this is a good bit”… STFU.
Do not give spoilers… STFU.
Do not give running commentary… STFU.
Do not talk on your mobile phone… turn it off.
Do not text on your mobile phone… turn it off.
Do not look at your mobile phone… turn it off.
Do not crunch your vat of popcorn like an annoying motherfucker.
Do not crunch chips like an annoying motherfucker.
Do not crunch anything like an annoying motherfucker.
Do not slurp your drink like an annoying motherfucker.
Do not have sex.
Do not get up to go to the toilet 97 fucking times.
Do not leave your popcorn carton and crap when the movie finishes… take it with you.
Do not be an arsehole in the cinema.
©Do not be an arsehole.